Clueless: Disappearance / Return of vurbmoto

True story, the day vurbmoto closed down (January 21st, 2017 for those that count) I was sitting in a McDonald’s in Auckland and just following all the internet chatter. I was there so long that I ordered two meals, lunch and dinner, reading all the comments, the tweets, the Instagram messages. It was a sad day and one that I’ll never forget, as I mistakenly forgot to take the pickle out of the Big Mac I ordered… ughhh.

Now though, like Michael Jordan signing for the Washington Wizards, or like Andy Ruiz Jr eating 1000 pies before his rematch against Anthony Joshua, vurbmoto is back and ready to once again liven up your lives with spelling-mistake riddled articles, potato-taken photos and video footage that pre-dates digital. Everyone loves a sporting comeback and we hope that you’ll keep that in mind when you tell us how much better we were five years ago.

Still, back we are, and that means I can finally write Clueless again, which will hopefully please some of you. Of course I don’t expect it to please everyone and that’s fine, because I didn’t worry about those people five years ago and I certainly won’t be worrying about them now. With seven races in 21 days, I don’t think I’ll be able to keep up and do a Clueless after each, but I’ll at least try to keep them weekly. Or not. Either way, this article focuses on why vurbmoto went away and why we’re coming back…

• Vurbmoto made so much money that we literally all retired to beaches…
• Hahahaha
• Haha
• Seriously, you must have confused motocross with E-Gaming if you think a motocross media company was able to do that
• We heard insta-bangers were going to become popular and couldn’t keep up
• Wes also can’t turn his RED camera 90 degrees to film in portrait mode, so there was that
• If James Stewart can quit and still get talked about, we figured we could too
• Turns out, we can’t
• Mitch Payton was getting a bit too close to the edge for our liking, so needed us to keep an eye on him
• Where the hell does everyone keep up with amateur motocross nowadays?
• Oh right… Instagram
• Adam Cianciarulo asked us to come back
• We can’t bare people ripping off all our ideas, just because they’ve waited three years to implement them #chargersvsanchors
• We all bought shares in Alta and have been living off those “earnings” …
• If BamBam can reinvent himself and only takeout people half of the time, we figured we could reinvent ourselves too by only doing half of the work
• It looked like every other media outlet had shut down, so we hoped we would comeback as #1… guess Racer X didn’t get the memo
• Stilez Robertson wanted footage of him defending his Ponca City 2009 50-450 6-18 Stk Mod Class trophy, as he’s now on a 450
• We all got pinged by USADA / WADA and our ban is finally over
• All of the clothes that we picked up by working for various companies over the years are smelly and have holes in them, so we need new supplies
• Feld wasn’t going to restart the season. Then they heard we were coming back so…. you’re welcome